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It's like saying to her, "I really like you, except this one big part of you that happens to be paying the bills." Several officers have explained to me that this makes them feel completely unappreciated, as if what they do as female police officers doesn't count.
They feel that if they were men, they would be considered heroes for their chosen occupation, but as women they are just doing something to upset their partner. For me personally, I was a divorced mom when I became an officer. It felt like men were looking for a challenge or they wanted to be able to put an "X" in the box on their bucket list that reads, "Dated a Cop." Some of our challenges are obvious—we can't date criminals or our bosses, and sometimes these seem to be the only people around.
I have 15 yrs on in the biggest PD & I don't date cops, so I totally understand. It is exactly what you said, a notch on the belt or an intimidation factor.
I actually find most of the male cops are actually married to stay at home moms or women that are rather docile & subservient. Women look for equals, men look for the damsel in distress.
Because guest what, there is no such thing as "Prince Charming". My final thought is that if gonna date a woman, date a female cop for godsake; it will do you some good.
Well, I feel every Policy officer or law enforcement Person is very special..
As police officers, we deal with people in tense situations every day and take it in stride.
I wish I could find a nice female or male Police officer to start a Friendship with...
Women who date female officers have trouble with this too.
This causes relational boundary issues that, especially when couples are dating and still getting to know one another, create tension when the partner isn't comfortable with the woman being an officer.
Why is it that what seems fairly black and white for us when we deal with other people's relationship issues on calls usually ends up being a giant mess for us as female police officers?
I've asked myself, are there special challenges for me because I'm an officer?